Hey Good Lookin': How to Get More Joy Out of What You Wear

Dress up was one of my favorite games I played as a little girl. My family, comprised of two older sisters and a younger brother, had a treasure trove of ballet costumes, scarves, hats, and old dresses that I would wear in no particular order. An old pair of bloomers could make a hat, a silky scarf could become a tube top. Long before the word fashion had entered my vocabulary much less influenced my taste, I dressed based on whims and imaginary scenarios. Was I feeling like a fancy fairy godmother or a tattered, forgotten Cinderella? Maybe both. Or as the world of psycholinguistics now advises us, both/and.

Both/and would become one of my signature fashions, my own little evil genius style. However, as a girl growing up in the South, even in the 1980s, I quickly learned that whimsical dressing was meant for play only. Mad scientist clothing ensembles were not invited into polite society, which in my case mostly meant church or school.

But here’s the thing about evil geniuses. They want out. 

***

When Hank Williams recorded his hit “Hey Good Lookin’” back in 1951, the lyrics were directed at someone ‘out there’ and in the same way I guess you are who I am talking to when I chose this title. But another way I want you to think about this greeting is how you see and talk to the person ‘in here,’ the person inside, the person you see when you look in the mirror because today we’re going to investigate the ancient two part wardrobe dilemma known as deciding what to wear and actually feeling good about how you look. In other words, we’re talking about clothes, we’re talking about fashion, we’re talking about happiness. 

I really wanted this article to be fun and inspiring—and it is! But first I have to tell you something. The more I researched how to dress yourself and the ease of a capsule wardrobe, the more I realized that talking about fashion is a loaded subject. And I’ll be honest, I started to freak out. I became so worried about giving fashion advice that could perpetuate the negative feelings many women have about their bodies or contribute to some kind of feminine stereotype that’s hurting me and the girlfriends or writing something that plays into conditioning women to see themselves through the lens of the male gaze…

It was enough to psych myself out. 

So here’s what I did. I mean here’s what I did after talking to Kyle, after hashing it out with my girlfriends Jenni and Ania, after getting feedback from gal pals Shelly and Tanya, after breaking it down with my professor friend Cheri. I can’t remember but I am pretty sure I had at least one conversation about this with my cousin Brie. After all the researching and talking and conducting of one fantastic interview that you'll hear in the second half of this article, I decided my stuckness was a rhetorical problem not a hot topic problem, which in the land of composition theory translates to having an organizational strategy and using logic to put boundaries around your topic. Did she say boundaries? Yes. Writing is a lot like life.

So here’s what’s gonna happen in this article, as I attempt to have my cake and eat it too: I’m going to spend a little time upfront summarizing the complex relationship between how we feel about our bodies and how we feel about our clothes. And since body satisfaction is such a big topic that’s all I’m going to do…for now. I’m not going to go all crazy with charts, data, and definitions because then we’d never get to color therapy and dressing for more good vibes. BUT you can bet your bottom dollar the Naked Librarian will be back to interrogate this subject more. Because as women, we deeply need help loving and accepting our bodies. 

After the brief PSA, I’m going to cover a little fashion vocabulary, where some terms may sound familiar like capsule wardrobe and color story while others may sound new like dopamine dressing and enclothed cognition. But that’s not all. For the grand finale, we’re gonna spend thirty minutes with a brilliant personal stylist named Daron Deonier who helps women learn what she calls the difference between ‘covering your body’ and ‘honoring your vessel.” Daron’s got more mind blowing paradigm shifts, fashion philosophy, and because I know you want this, wardrobe hacks that you can apply not just today but year round. 

Sound good? Good! Because I am pretty pumped about this. 

And speaking of aerosol cans, let’s kick off today’s episode of the Naked News with a special story called: How little Victoria and a bottle of stolen hairspray freed her adorable, evil genius.

***

Hairspray Rebellion

It happened when I was a third grader attending 10th Street Elementary in Anniston, Alabama. Later we would know it to be the height of 80s fashion, but at the time, the colorful, print tops and matching pants were more uniform than statement. 

It was the age of jellies, translucent plastic shoes molded in swirl and zigzag patterns. Bright, plastic jelly bracelets were also very popular and your job was to wear them stacked high on both arms. It was the year of my first Members Only jacket, a very hot ticket in my letter to Santa that Christmas. When that shimmery, teal, parachute-like bomber jacket arrived with the bonafide Members Only logo on the front, I couldn’t wait for the first day back to school from winter break. I could only pray that a few of my friends came out unlucky so I could prance around the playground like the lottery winner I was. 

It was also the one and only year I shared a bedroom with my sister, CJ, who was seven years older. We’d relocated to Anniston in a whirlwind, after a hotel break-in panicked my parents and we high-tailed it out of Georgia. The exciting life of a father-marijuana-smuggler strikes again! 

At first we’d settled in a very nice rental house in Anniston, where I bunked with my sister Bell. The two of us were 18 months apart and my mom enjoyed dressing us like twins. Wherever we moved, Bell was instantly popular so I never minded our association. “Are you Bell’s sister?” older kids would ask. Or they’d just confuse us and call me Bell. Not one to mess with the likability algorithms, I considered positive associations and mistaken identity equally good fortune. 

If I’d thought my Member’s Only jacket meant I was a legit lucky duck, it was nothing compared to getting to cohabitate with CJ when we moved to the little house that shared a fence with 10th Street Elementary. Carey Jo, a name only a handful of people can call her, had the bad attitude and musical taste of a teenager. She hated, absolutely hated, sharing a room with me. The injustice began after CJ had drawn the short stick when Bell litigated the unfairness of CJ always getting her own room. Why couldn’t someone else have their own room? Aren’t we supposed to take turns in this family? Ah, Bell. Hippy parents meant sharing was a prized family value and Bell had my parents by the balls. 

My younger brother got his own room whenever possible, and it was fine by the rest of us. No one wanted to share with him, anyway. He was going through his Tasmanian devil phase. Kenneth-Billy-Jake-Payne, a multisyllabic name he gave himself, was also going through a Woody Woodpecker laugh phase. Fun enough for annoying parents at dinner time but not the kind of roommate you’re looking for. 

I, on the other hand, knew exactly how I was going to play this family conflict. Somebody hand me a cape because I’m about to self-sacrifice to make my parents love me more. Bell and I could live to fight about something else on a different day. And by selecting the self-sacrifice card, I told myself that I could win the bigger prize at stake. I could finally get CJ to like me and for her to take me under her wing. 

But CJ had this deep-seated loathing for her three younger siblings. Bell came along to oust her at five years old, then me, then Jake in every other year successions. Plus, she was mom’s built-in babysitter. Let’s just say she kept us alive. And when it was time to stick it to our parents and run away she took us along. (True story.) But you know all those sweet big sisters that pick four-leaf clovers and read you stories? CJ was having none of that. She was more interested in giving you arm burns and threatening to wash your mouth out with soap if you snuck a curse word. Like my manufactured bedroom sacrifice, the day CJ used a bar of ivory soap to teach me a lesson, she unwittingly fell for the trap I’d laid. What would it be like to have all her attention pointed at me? Would she really do it? And what did soap taste like anyway? I remember the punishment as exciting and fun. 

In the days we lived on 10th Street, CJ would wake up early and blast her Stevie Nicks records while I slept in the adjacent 4-poster bed. She meant this as an act of aggression, a good ole fuck you little sister. But I loved it! It felt like awakening to a concert and a front row seat to CJ’s middle school preparations. 

I learned early to forget about conversation with CJ in the morning. No talking, no problem. I just stared at her while she got ready and played with her makeup when she left the room. Most days she dawned blue jeans, an Izod shirt with the collar flipped up, and a thin woven belt. CJ wore her hair short like Princess Di and relied on hairspray to seal the deal. She was a brown-eyed brunette in a family of blonde children, which to me, gave her added visual interest. In a year or two, CJ would go through her punk phase and stay up late painting marine life in her bedroom, while sneaking puffs of menthols out her window. She would perfect asymmetrical hairdos and scowling. We’d be back in Roswell, Georgia by then, and she’d have her own room plus a lock on the door. 

80s fashion trends interested me less than the green light for self-expression. At least, that’s how I experienced the dramatic makeup and angular clothing of the time. Women seemed to dress as if a performance would happen later that night. And it was not easy to tell if they were starring in or attending the event. I could see that my mom, Martha, had mixed feelings about this. As a small woman, standing at 4’10 and coming in at 80 pounds soaking wet, she found a local tailor in Anniston who could make her clothes. No more shopping in the children’s section. Martha got custom clothes for a deal because of her size—the tailor needed fewer yards of European fabric to outfit my mom with one-of-a-kind clothing made from a muted palette of greens, browns, and burgundy. She looked like a tiny abstract work of art. 

Martha had grown up in a time and place that valued a neat and tidy appearance. She may have hitchhiked from Atlanta to Miami in 1972 to protest war in bell bottoms and a halter top, where destiny introduced her to my father, but the pressure of motherhood swung her back the other way. In her lectures on appearance, Mom prioritized certain stories. There was the one about her grandmother who taught her how to iron. Lilly Bell, a wonderful woman and closet alcoholic, a detail Mom never failed to emphasize, believed that crisp-ironed clothing makes the person. “Even if you are poor,” Lilly Bell lectured us from the grave, “You can still be clean and iron your clothes.”  

There was also the morality tale about being grateful for what you’ve got and for also not growing up in 1950s North Georgia. It went like this. As a child, Martha Bell had just one special dress. And she was required to freshen up and wear it down to Sunday dinner, where her mother, Lettie Sue, had worked all day in a hot kitchen preparing their meal. Before that, Lettie Sue, the grandmother we called Bobo, was out in the yard, ringing the neck of her own chicken. She made a fresh pie every night. Imagine that! Oh, and no talking at dinner. Good manners at that time meant being good and shutting up. This rigid cultural norm may explain why Martha has talked as much as she wants in her grown up years. 

Mom was also full of personal, cautionary tales that frequently cast her as a hyper, curious girl who wanted very much to be liked and who also very much drove everyone crazy. The one we heard most was about watching out for bad people in authority who want to embarrass you for fun and cause you to unconsciously sow seeds of self-hatred that you bury and dig up for special talks with your kids. Lord if you were present for mom’s story about the mean old teacher who called her to the front of the class and brushed out her teased hair in an act of certain humiliation. Mom’s trauma was so deep-seated that fastidious hair combing and styling became one of her most important mothering honor badges. And I have the pictures to prove it. No matter the hairdo, I always ended up looking like a hand-drawn child in an advertisement from the 1950s minus the sparkle grin. And because parents make no sense whatsoever, on other occasions, pizazz was something Martha Bell added herself. I will save the story for another day about our Anniston years and Miss Cinderella pageants and my near-disqualification due to Mom’s obsession with canned sparkle spray and the gratuity of double crinolines.

Children, even evil geniuses like me, love their parents. I knew how important it was for Mom to feel proud of her offspring—to prove to the world that she was good because look here, see here how clean and beautiful these four children are. But I had the itch of self-expression. When left to my own devices, I dressed to the rhythm of my own heartbeat. In my house, that meant a fight or a secret. Every day was different. 

On the day of my evil genius jailbreak, I remember the great thrill of it all. CJ had already left for school, and I was alone in the bedroom with the only tools I needed: a hairbrush and hairspray. 

Stevie Nicks and I got to work. 

Stand back, stand back

In the middle of my room, I did not hear from you

It's alright, it's alright

To be standing in a line…

The first move I made was to comb all strands of hair to the right side of my head. I’ve always had baby fine hair, and as an 8 year old, it was simple to use the hairbrush to create the effect of being caught in a sudden windstorm. With each hair in position, I lifted the Aquanet to 11 o’clock and sprayed vigorously, then studied myself in the mirror. I fell in love with the look I’d manifested from a combination of 80s fashion magazines and cartoon hair-dos. I looked impossible and perfect. 

The only problem was the screen door. I felt confident in my tip-toe-ability, but how could I both time my exit and avoid the calamity of the screen door slam. I held my breath and went for it, the household objects a blur as I raced outside, took a hard right, and crossed the yard toward the chain link fence that separated our house and the school sidewalk. I was nearly home free when I heard the cries of Martha Bell ringing from the driveway, “Victoria Sue Payne! What have you done to your hair?!” 

She was late. I was untouchable now, too far away to be wrangled and coiffed. The freedom pulsed in my little arms and legs. I did not look back, but only shouted “hairspray” over my shoulder before skipping my way to the entrance of 10th Street Elementary and down the hallway to Mrs. Jones’s third grade class. 

*** 

Where did all the good times go? 

How fun would it be to go back in time and bottle up some of that young Victoria moxie and douse myself from time to time? Maybe you’d like some too. 

If you’re like a lot of women I talk to, clothing is a big part of your life. From what you’re going to wear, to wearing what you like best, to following trends, to trouble shooting event dressing when it’s cold and rainy, to caring or not caring what other people think, to taking your bra off the moment you walk in the door, because honestly can’t we just let the girls be free, to researching a supportive workout bra, to flaunting in public without a bra because you can (I know I did this last summer and was like OMG my boobs are so loud and also I am woman, hear me roar), to cleaning out your closet, to negotiating with yourself about how much you’d be willing to pay for a pair of jeans that fit, to trying to dress cute in the rain, to feeling like talking about fashion and using words like ‘cute’ makes you frivolous, to knowing the date of the Nordstrom Anniverary sale, to pouncing on online shopping deals, to scoring big at a thrift shop, to selling your clothes on Poshmark, to daydreaming about what you’d look like in a jumper, to scouring the internet for a bolero because cold and light showers are forecasted on your June wedding day, to asking strangers questions like where did you get those shoes, to knowing what colors look great on you, to procuring pink or red or yellow or polka dotted rain boots, to nesting inside cozy pajamas, to understanding sustainable fabrics, to buying from sustainable brands, to upcycling your cast offs, to wearing funny socks, to liking trucker hats, to discovering the perfect LBD, to preferring sneakers, to finding comfortable heels, to declaring no more heels, to insisting from now on it’s just yoga pants no more jeans, to owning athleisure wear, to gussying up for zoom calls, to saying oh shit I need a bathing suit, to saying oh shit again and googling bathing suit cover up, to buying spring sweaters in winter, to shouting at no one in particular is it ever going to fucking stop raining in Portland, to maybe, just maybe, accepting the rain and buying a sexy raincoat that makes you happy.

Ladies, even if you don’t care about clothes or trends or shopping, just getting dressed for the day is a big part of our lives. What you wear is more than frivolity. Daniel Benkendorf, an associate professor of psychology at the Fashion Institute of Technology, told VICE magazine that what we wear is far from shallow and is deeply tied to our emotional well-being. According to Beckendorf, “Clothing is rich with meaning and purpose. The link between clothing and emotions is reciprocal—how we feel impacts what we think about our clothing, and it guides our decisions about what to wear. But what we wear also impacts how we feel and what we think.” 

It’s this reciprocal relationship that I think deserves a little TLC before we dive into the fun and excitement of dressing for joy. Because I think it's high time that the minutes spent wondering about what to wear become a happier, more enriching way of using up our precious wad of time. 

Why you hate your clothes 

Fashion and culture has not always been kind to women. From pant bans to corsets to girdles to spanx, women have been bombarded with ways to turn our ‘inadequate’ bodies into sexy kittens. And let’s face it, as I discussed in Peanut Butter Revelation, a lot of our training around getting found and looking fabulous comes from other women. 

I decided to research this topic because I’d become very unhappy with my clothes. I was bored of everything. I wondered if the promises of a capsule wardrobe—more on that soon—might cure my angst. But as a 5’3, curvy, 48-year-old woman I soon discovered that I needed a greater sense of what styles would work for me if I was going to feel better about my options. I couldn’t just copy a capsule wardrobe carte blanche. Which led me to research about body types, which caused me to measure my body to see if I am an inverted triangle or hourglass, to research about whether body typing is outdated, to understanding how fat phobia fits into all of this, to deciding I do not want to  be part of the problem. 

In a Body Image Report by the Mental Health Foundation based in the UK, 20% of adult participants felt ashamed, 34% felt bummed out, and 19% felt flat out disgusted by their body image. Among teen respondents, 37% felt upset and 31% felt ashamed about their body image. The report highlights that “Higher body dissatisfaction is associated with poorer quality of life, psychological distress and the risk of unhealthy eating behaviors and eating disorders.” On the other hand, body satisfaction and appreciation is associated with improved well-being and healthier eating habits. 

Fashion psychologists warn that a lot of clothing dissatisfaction is tied to our body dissatisfaction. While this may seem obvious, it’s important to pause here. Because that means our wardrobe unhappiness may not be so easy to resolve. So before you go shopping, throw away your old clothes, or quiet quit and fall in frustration to the floor, psychologists recommend you attempt to understand what’s behind your clothing ennui. For many of us, it may require self-reconciliation. 

Reconciling with your body image is a much bigger conversation that I’m not going to dive into fully today, but I do want to take a moment and encourage you to do the work to love yourself, which includes your body. You can still have goals, especially if you’re working on something for health related reasons, but don’t wait to love your body on some day off in the future. Start doing it today. And if you experience self-loathing because your favorite jeans don’t fit, get rid of them or put ‘em away, and then find a thrift store where you can get the size you need fast and cheap, or if you can afford it, go ahead, buy a fancy $200 pair because they make you feel great. Let go of the belief that you are one size anyway, since size varies widely across different brands. Honor your beautiful body today. It has gotten you this far. 

And if this all sounds impossible, stick with me. Because I think you’re gonna love where we’re going next, which has little to do with shape or size. Instead, we’re going to talk about how to tap into your interests, likes, and emotions so that you can nurture a sense of self-confidence, even find more meaning in your everyday life. Getting intentional with your wardrobe is all about connecting with yourself so that you like how you’re expressing yourself from the inside out. And for those of you who like checklists, you’re in luck. Because at the end of this segment, I’ve included a handy dopamine dressing checklist. 

The Happy Wardrobe Philosophy 

Life is hard. And you won’t always feel happy. That’s normal. Some people even believe that expecting our lives to be happy is part of why we’re so unhappy. Accepting the pain and suffering of life is even something I talk about in a previous episode of the Naked News called “The Dog Ate My Compass.” So, if you’re like geez Victoria, why are you so obsessed with being happy all the time?! Please know that what I am most interested in is finding joy in our ordinary lives because a long and blessed life can also be filled with unwanted difficulty.

Now that that’s out of the way, let’s have some fun. Allow me to set the mood. 

You’re hanging out with your oldest gal pals or your group of friends who are comfortable talking about both nail polish and the emotional ride of perimenopause. Y’all are eating cheeses and fruits, little salads spiked with pomegranate seeds, creamy bites of homemade guacamole and lime zested tortilla chips, maybe some marinated chicken skewers if you eat meat, definitely some charcuterie if you eat meat, some sparkling water with more pomegranate seeds or sparkling wine if your girl fam likes bubbles, and someone is passing around a box of cookies or a bar of chocolate and you’re just eating what you want because you’re probably not hungry anymore because you’ve been snacking so much. And the mood is light and comfy and you’ve already told each other how much you like your hairstyle, earrings, grandpa sweaters, or jumpsuits. With these ladies, what you wear just depends on the day because your besties are a come-as-you-are coterie — some days y’all look like fancy sexy mamas and some days you’re like these are the sweats I like to wear over my period panties. 

And right smack dab in the middle of your social hour, one of your friends scoops a dollop of hummus on a cucumber and blurts out, “I’m so done with deciding what to wear. I think I might just give up.” And thus begins a long, informative conversation on fashion, replete with fascinating vocab you mentally note as possible answers on Jeopardy. So here we go, five fashion words for the optimal wardrobe IQ.

Smart Dressing with a Capsule Wardrobes

So let’s talk about a fashion ideology known as the capsule wardrobe. According to Modern Minimalism and most other fashion blogs, “A capsule wardrobe is simply a collection of clothing composed of thoughtfully curated, easily interchangeable items designed to maximize the number of outfits that you can create.” In other words, you have less clothes but plenty of outfit possibilities. 

I was initially drawn to the notion of a capsule wardrobe because I noticed that sometimes the clothes I bought on sale don’t last or fun items I’d bought a few years ago were no longer in season. But mainly I wanted to better understand capsule wardrobes because I wanted to solve the daily question around ‘what I am going to wear’ with something I really liked. And as I get older and my lifestyle and body changes, this has been getting harder to do. 

In an earlier edition of the Naked News, Delight & Disorder, I discussed Marie Kondo’s method of purging/keeping items based on the joy factor. Identifying clothing that brings you joy or have meaning to you is another way some stylists recommend creating a capsule wardrobe: build it around what you already love. 

 Applying the principles of capsule wardrobe dressing begins with reducing and simplifying what you actually have in your closet. Elle Penner, the blog writer I quoted earlier suggests using this checklist to help bypass decision fatigue. She says, say goodbye to clothes that:

•  Don’t fit 
• You don’t like
• Are duplicates or very similar in color and style to something else you own
• Don’t work with your skin tone or body type
• Are stained or damaged beyond repair.

 Easy enough, right? 

There’s also a ton of information on capsule wardrobes online, even apps to help you itemize what you already have and remind you what you need to buy based on the capsule algorithm. There are even brands that will sell you the entire capsule wardrobe of your choosing in one fell swoop. 

 While I love the idea of solving my daily clothing dilemma, I couldn’t help but notice that a lot of the capsule wardrobe suggestions would leave us all looking the same. As much as I would like a uniform to make my life easy, my evil genius is like hey, remember me? 

Fortunately, creating a happy wardrobe is not limited to formulas of black, tan, and striped tees. 

Hello Dopamine Dressing 

The internet jokes about millennials and beige clothing are hilarious. I am especially fond of the woman who spoofs a children's catalog where small children wear head to toe neutrals and vexed facial expressions. 

Neutral tones may be the latest trend, and honestly if it’s a fine-tuned monochromatic style, like shades of tans and grays, more power to you. You probably look elegant and timeless, and we’re all super envious at how well you pull that off. But the history and psychology behind wearing color is thankfully not a trend: it’s science. Also, if you really want to wake up your senses try a monochromatic outfit with brighter, bolder colors, something Daron showed me how to do in our styling session.

Using color in your wardrobe in order to brighten your mood or cause pleasure is something fashion psychologists call dopamine dressing.  Here’s how Maria Constantine, a lecturer in cultural and historical studies at the London College of Fashion, explains dopamine in a 2022 edition of Harper’s Bazaar: “Our bodies produce dopamine and our nervous system uses it to send messages between nerve cells. It has many functions: it is involved in reward, motivation, memory, and attention. When dopamine is released in large amounts, it creates feelings of pleasure and reward which motivates us to repeat a specific behavior.” 

So what does all that mean when it comes to our clothes? If we’re going to have happier wardrobes, we need garments that pack a heavy dopamine punch. And color is one of the studied ways we receive a dopamine high. 

While there’s some science behind specific colors enhancing certain moods like red for passion or green for growth (or red and green for a jolly holiday spirit), most color psychologists agree that how a color makes you feel is highly personal and sometimes cultural. For example, while white is an established bridal color in the West it is associated with both purity and rebirth in places like East Asia, which means it's commonly worn in times of mourning. 

I would also add from personal experience that certain color associations may have kept you from exploring colors that you might like or make you feel super good. For me, most of my life I’ve avoided pink. At some point, I decided that pink was too stereotypically feminine to me and I was especially averse to bright pink or anything on the Barbie pink spectrum. 

Then, a few years back, after an awesome style consultation with image strategist and consultant, Zayna Rose, I discovered that pale pink is actually a much better neutral color for me than white. Zayna’s work is all about helping individuals and entrepreneurs translate their style digitally, and she has a great Tedx Talk on first impressions that you can find at zaynarose.com. I had to do some of the self-reconciliation work I was talking about earlier in order to trust Zayna’s diagnosis, but it turns out she was right. I still kept white in my closet but I added a couple of pale pink tops into the mix. Interestingly when I purged two thirds of my wardrobe during my project on tidiness, both of those light pink tops made the cut. 

Pink has made an even more recent emergence in my wardrobe after I met Daron Deonier, the stylist you’re going to hear from soon. That’s because Daron had the audacity to suggest I try wearing not pale pink but bright pink. It helped that when I showed up for our appointment she was wearing a hot pink blazer and bright red lipstick. She looked so vibrant and confident. I wasn’t sure I could overcome my pink allergy but when I tried on the first magenta-colored sweater I saw how the color complimented the subtle pink undertones in my skin tone, my blonde hair, and blue eyes. I liked how I looked, and after a few minutes I literally felt more embodied and energized. What a surprise! 

By the way, I went down a rabbit hole trying to understand pink psychology and learned that while pale pink is considered soft and peaceful, hot pink is considered ‘bold, exciting, and alarming!’ Sounds like my evil genius likes the feeling of getting loud, of “hey everybody, look at me!’ So this same energy-exchange thing happened when I took a second leap of faith and tried on a very bright green top, another color dare from Daron. My whole body just seemed to wake up and slap-happy grin. 

So that’s how I became a believer in dopamine dressing and started the process of thinking about how to create what Daron and other fashion gurus call a color story, or a palette of colors that work together to create a fashion statement, out of pinks and greens. (And also blues, since that was the main story happening already in my closet.)

When it comes to dressing for joy, color isn’t the only contributor. Wearing clothes, shoes, and accessories that bring you meaning also contribute to how you feel in your body. 

While dopamine dressing is all about dressing for more good vibes, how we feel in our clothes in general goes by the name: ‘enclothed cognition.’ This term was introduced in 2012 when researchers Harjo Adam and Adam Galinski conducted a study to examine ‘the co-occurrence of two independent factors—the symbolic meaning of  clothes and the physical act of wearing them.” Their initial research looked specifically at the effect of wearing a white lab coat. In a study published in the Journal of Experimental Psychology, they found that attention increased among 41 female and 18 male undergraduates when the lab coat was associated with being a doctor. If the symbolic association changed and the lab coat represented a painter, the researchers found no change in overall attention. 

So what’s important to remember about enclothed cognition isn’t really about lab coats and enhanced attention to detail but rather the symbolic association between certain clothing and the psychological effect on the wearer. In this study, researchers theorized that when participants were told the lab coat was a doctor’s coat, they became more focused and detail-oriented due to characteristics associated with doctors and scientists. When it comes to your closet and dressing for what will bring you the most joy and satisfaction, your personal association with your clothing matters. And that’s another reason to seek out your own personal style, which provides your best shot at buying clothing that will last longer and even cross-over into more seasons—something we’ll discuss how to do soon with Daron. 

Your Dopamine Dressing Cheat Sheet 

So as we wrap up this section, I want to give you a little cheat sheet for dopamine dressing based on a few themes that kept reoccuring in my research. When you want to feel better in your clothes, pay attention to these four things: 

Color – what colors bring you joy, enhance your unique skin/eye/hair combination, make you feel confident, or energized? Note: You may have a favorite color that doesn’t check all of these boxes. I love yellow, for example, but it can be hard to find the right shade to wear on my body. That’s why I try to accessorize (especially shoes) with yellow. And boy oh boy do yellow shoes make me feel like I’ve got the joy joy joy down in my heart. 

Quality – In an age of fast fashion, it’s easy to find inexpensive items that look good but don’t last. Everyone has their own fashion budget, but capsule wardrobe proponents encourage you to invest in high-quality clothing that not only lasts but looks great on your unique body. If you’re looking for more meaning in your wardrobe, saving up for a $100+ sweater in your favorite color or a $200+ classic silk dress that you love is a way to feel more intentional about what you’re wearing. There are even some newer brands who are finding ways to make more sustainable fashion staples like cashmere sweaters for far less. Quince is one company that’s working to bring more eco-friendly, affordable, classic clothing to the everyday person. You can learn more about their mission, $50 cashmere sweaters, washable silk blouses, and Mongolian cashmere goats at https://www.onequince.com/. I just ordered a black European linen jumpsuit and kelly green v-neck cashmere sweater for a grand total of $109 as a contribution to the year-round capsule wardrobe I’m building with my new color story. I’ll make sure to share my quality review when it arrives in the mail later this week.

Feel – There’s a reason we associate certain fabrics like cashmere, silk, and 100% organic cotton with luxury — when these fabrics are high-quality they feel really good on your body. Sensory satisfaction is a fashion term that describes the pleasurable feeling we get from touching textiles. And this makes sense to me. How many times have you admired your friend’s outfit and she’s like “But wait, you’ve got to feel it!” And then you pet her shoulder like she’s your new best kitten. Wait, you haven’t done this? Consider this a bucket list item, then find friends who want you to feel their clothes. These will be the same people who will listen to your problems and cheer you up on your harder days. 

Fit – We’re going to talk about this more with Daron. But ‘fit’ is one of those things that’s highly personal. Experienced stylists can help determine brands that might fit your body better once they learn more about your unique body shape, typical sizing, and favorite brands. As one of the many women who suffer from jean fatigue, I was amazed at how Daron already had a brand in mind for me based on my intake form. And she was right! The jeans she curated for me fit great, which must have been no easy task as I am a 5 '3 woman with long legs who doesn’t wear petites, even though most women’s brands make clothing meant for someone 5' 5 or taller. I’ve also learned to avoid pants that have bulky material around my midsection, which means it’s time to let go of the high-waisted sweater sweats I bought during Athleta’s summer sale. High-waisted jeans that fit well look fantastic on me but high-waisted sweats, or perhaps just high-waisted sweater sweats from Athleta with a drawstring, add lumpy layers around my middle or what I fondly call my ‘memories.’ I am sure the 5’10 model who sported these in their ad looks and feels fabulous in sweater sweats, but me? Not so much. I know this for certain because while writing this article I wore them to Trader Joe’s just to see if they might work as grocery ware before sending them to consignment. So long sweater sweats – it’s not me, it’s you. 

As much as fit may conjure up the old apple, pear, rectangle discussion, that’s not really what true ‘fit’ is about. Instead, it’s about working with your unique body and finding styles and brands that you like and support you in loving how you look. We have enough negative body self-talk to go around – no need to give it ammo with clothing that doesn’t fit. BTW: Some fashion watchers believe that there is no such thing as the decried 'muffin top'. Instead, they argue it’s a bad clothing fit that doesn’t work for your beautiful body. And: Studies have shown that bigger thighs may be a positive bio-marker, with thicker thighs linked to lower rates of heart disease. 

So whether it’s your long legs, minimal torso, beautiful curves, voluptuous breasts, shapely thighs, narrow waist, happy belly, or gorgeous back muscles, or all of the above, your body is just waiting to be accepted by you. And once the two of you are working together, the odds of you liking your clothes go way up. You liking, dare I say loving, your body is also a very healthy motivation if you’ve decided to start a new workout routine, improve your diet, drink less alcohol, drink more water, or go after stubborn weight loss goals. We’ll talk about this more in a future Naked News episode but please know these reminders are for me too. I am working hard to rewrite the old narrative on body dissatisfaction in order to embrace all of me. 

In fact, self-celebration, something I discussed in the article called Peanut Butter Revelation, is exactly where we’re headed in our final segment. Let’s go meet Daron.

Wisdom for Honoring Your Vessel with Personal Stylist, Daron Deonier

This segment has been optimized for audio so if you want the Cadilac experience I suggest listening vs reading. Go here to listen and fast forward to minute 44:02.

So I first heard about Daron when I was having lunch with my girlfriends Jenni and Ania. We met up in North Portland at the Rambler for a rare day of day drinking and food and to catch up on our busy lives. Jeni was sipping on an IPA, and I had ordered a dry cider and tacos, while Ania, who was in the middle of tax season at her office, opted for a hot toddy known for its medicinal properties. Later, we would browse the shops of North Mississippi where I'd buy a vintage white and black polka dot blouse for $17 and an overpriced chambray jumpsuit whose two top buttons turned out to gape a little too much. Now I'm wondering if there's a fix to this outfit or if I'm doomed to a choice between ill-fitting buttons or an ultra peekaboo fit, a la the Ladies from Cannonball Run.

Girlfriends are the ultimate source of knowledge, so when Ania, who is one of my most stylish friends, heard about my project and suggested I talk to Daron, I knew I'd already scored a golden ticket.

"You will love her," said Ania. "The two of you could be friends."

After meeting Daron, I immediately knew what Ania meant. You trust Daron because she's comfortable in her own skin, and when you learn how she got there, you like her even more.

Daron studied apparel and textiles at Washington State University where she says she focused more on dressing bodies than selling garments. She's been a personal stylist for over 20 years and is currently a stylist, the Director of Sales, and a buyer at the Difference in Vancouver, Washington and Lake Oswego, Oregon. Daron's been featured on KGW, a local Northwest news channel, on her ability to offer personal styling remotely. And she offers regular style tips and advice over on Instagram at _life_styled_by_daron.

Daron told me that as a teenager she found dressing herself a great source of frustration, and without trying, found there was a lot of negative energy around her body. "I had what some would call a 'normal' body," Daron told me, "but I needed to try on 30 pairs of jeans to find something that worked. I just wasn't straight up and down." Her frustration had an interesting side effect. Like a lot of women. Daron came to believe there was something wrong with her body. She got into fashion in an effort to heal that wound, but admits it took years before she learned to really accept her body as it is. 

Below is a highlights reel of my conversation with Daron. If you want to learn more about dressing for your body, finding your unique style, how to 'fix' an outfit, how to use color to inspire your daily life, and more...read on. 

Here's what Daron told me about reconciling with her body: 

Daron:

I feel like for my journey my body was just waiting to be my friend. And once I got to that place—at nearly 30 years old before I kind of figured that out—I thought wow, all that joy that I withheld from myself for no good reason. I've learned to feel grateful for that experience though because it gave me the bank of empathy and understanding that I have today. Even though I haven't traveled all of the roads that my clients are on right now, I understand what it's like to feel disconnected from yourself. And so addressing the personal style aspect, even though it's exterior, it oftentimes starts a journey that can become so much more about connecting with yourself, not just dressing your exterior.

Victoria:

So let's just pause for a minute on that. What an mazing truth bomb! Dressing yourself doesn't have to be something you do for others. It can be a vehicle for connecting with yourself.

When it comes to learning how to dress herself, Daron says she likes to compare it to cooking. Once you understand the basics of how food gets made, you can depart from recipes and start creating your own. What I think happens for a lot of women is that we learn early to pay attention to trends, but not necessarily how to shop for clothing that works for our bodies. And since our bodies change throughout our life, the process is ongoing. That's why I enjoyed plugging into how Daron helps women figure out their style. Here's what Daron shared with me about her process.

Daron:

I find that when I work with clients often I would say that people come in and they've been in survival mode with their fashion. And what I mean by that is they're just covering their body. They're just wearing something that works. But that's not a joyful process and that's not honoring your whole person, and it's not honoring your vessel as well.

So on the personal styling side, the first thing that we start with is the form. So the form, the shape of someone's vessel, the shape of someone's body is really going to inform certain silhouettes that are going to be optimal for them. Sometimes it's based on how curvy you are. Sometimes it's based on your height, but it's a silhouette that you could put on and just feel really flattered by that style. There's also things to consider in regards to your skin tone, your hair color, your, your overall coloring, what colors are really going to sing for you and really be friendly in that regard.

So that's not always people's first preference. Sometimes we're drawn to things just because we like them, but they don't maybe like us back as much. For me that's chartreuse. I love using it in interior decor, but if I wear it, I don't look healthy.

So in that styling process, you're starting from kind of that outer form, right? And then taking into account things that you know are joyful for you. So if you're really into music and you're really into art, but you're basically just wearing black and white all the time, you're not fulfilling a piece of yourself that's gonna make you feel more joyful or more authentic. So when you start dressing for your personal style, I think it puts you more in touch with yourself as well.

Certain elements like your lifestyle also come into play. You need your clothes to do certain things for you on a certain day. So if you're someone who is very busy, your clothes need to be comfortable, accommodating, transitional. That's gonna also add to the joy part of your dressing and feeling comfortable in what you're wearing.

And then it's important to think about how do I want to be portrayed in the world? How do I wanna visually communicate myself? Especially if you're someone who's wanting to either make a change or you're looking at branding, maybe you're reinventing yourself or maybe you just wanna take up a little more space in the room.

Your visual presence does have a communication with others. So if you're thinking about what you want that to be, that brings in the intention. So for example, if you are starting a new business and you're doing a lot more brand building, utilizing color and utilizing styles that help you show up more in a room is going to be helpful for that lifestyle. It's also going to help you with your branding. So it all comes back to being intentional about what feels good to you and what suits your lifestyle.

Victoria:

So in my personal styling session with Daron, she introduced me to some really cool internal vocabulary she uses with clients. Instead of the typical apple, pear, or hourglass labels, Daron sees women's bodies and their personal style much more holistically. The "outside line" is what she refers to when it comes to things like your height, shape, skin tone, and hair and eye color. The "inside line" refers more to your personality and your likes and dislikes. And the "message" is another factor in the equation because as she mentioned, we often have a goal for our visual appearance, whether it's starting a new job, wanting to appear more confident or more intentional in what she calls our visual communication. We often hear about the importance of body language, but I love thinking about what we wear as one of our tools for communicating how we express ourselves to others.

So Daron and I had a lot of conversation about my wardrobe, and in our time together, she shared with me several style hacks for when you get dressed and still feel frustrated with how your clothes look or you're just bored by your overall appearance. I asked her to share more of these tips with you too.

Victoria:

I was wondering if you had any style hacks that you wish more women understood, especially if they're not liking what they're wearing that day. I know when I worked with you, you were like, you just fold up your sleeve and you've got this different look. So what are some things that you could share with more women about things that they can do with their current wardrobe?

Daron:

Yeah, so that's a great question and I'll start with the intro you gave me on the sleeves. So your wrist is one of the most narrow parts of the body. And so simply by giving yourself a three quarter sleeve, you've literally given more shape to what you're wearing regardless of what it is. And so if you put something on, maybe it's a sweater, maybe it's a jacket, and you look in the mirror and it feels heavy or boxy, you can roll the sleeve up to show a little wrist, maybe put a bracelet on or something to give more accent to that narrow position. You're telling the eye how narrow the body is underneath. And so visually that's why it works. It's not that you need to make yourself more narrow. You don't need to make yourself look more slender—it's just a visual trick to give more shape to what you're wearing.

Jeans can be a tricky space for women to navigate—we've got every iteration of inseam and width on the market right now for pants. One of the most common styles is a straight leg and a straight leg denim. If you're wearing that with a tennis shoe and they're kind of meeting each other, it can feel again kind of heavy and bulky, and you look in the mirror and you're like, I don't feel great right now, but I can't put my finger on it. It's because everything is stacking on top of each other. So simply cuffing that pant to see a little ankle or a little sock between the shoe, a little definition is going to give that visual length and also give that nice lean line.

A hack that I think is really commonly used and perhaps misunderstood goes by many different names. The French tuck, the front tuck, etc, I've heard many different versions. I like to use this to create what I called 'implied shape.' 

So if you have a shirt that is below your hip line, oftentimes the shirt is cut in a way that it's sort of cinching up on your hips, which can create a lot width right at the fullness of most people's body. I find that that's a sensitive area for a lot of women and they will wear tops that are that length to kind of cover that area. But if the top is longer than the bottom of your hip line, you're usually drawing attention to that. So if you were to take the top and tuck it in a little bit, right in the middle on either side of the zipper, it creates a curved line instead of a straight line, and that's going to make you look so much more narrow and lean and it's gonna be really flattering. It actually draws attention away from the fullness in the midsection most of the time. So I would say that's a big hack.

It also comes down to the type of fabric you're wearing. Does it drape nicely? Does it look bulky? So that really starts with selecting tops that are flattering to begin with and then enhancing that by adding that trick.

Another hack that I use all the time is belts, and I know people are afraid of belts again for that same reason. They don't necessarily want to draw attention, but it actually creates that visual anchor.

Besides all of the visual tricks, the ultimate hack is fit. If you are buying clothing that really fits you, instead of buying the idea of something that you want to fit a certain way, it's night and day how clothing can look on your body because there's a vast range of waistbands and styles and fabrics out there and there's something for everyone for sure.

Victoria:

So I wanna talk for a second about Daron's use of words like lines, shapes, and silhouettes. I talked about my own challenges with visual aptitude in the episode on tidiness, Delight and Disorder. If you missed that, I talked about my theory around how my difficulty with things like shapes, maps, directions, and infographics may contribute to the fatigue I feel around keeping things orderly. When I heard Daron talk about lines and other visual tricks, I was totally taking notes because I can't see or perceive what I don't like. It might not even be until later when I see a photo of myself in an outfit that I thought looked fine and then see that something's missing or ill-fitting. A little style tip that Daron showed me when I came into the shop was something called adding a third piece. A third piece is often a jacket, sweater or blazer that gives the body more shape and the feeling of a more complete looking outfit.

I also learned the benefit of a shorter top that lands near my waistline with a jacket that contours around my belt loops then lands closer to my hips. As my body ages, I've shied away from blouses that leave my "memories" exposed. But I felt so empowered by Daron to allow this part of my body to be visible instead of covered.

I also asked Daron to help us with another fashion conundrum I face daily, which is how to dress in a satisfying way when you work from home. I find myself sometimes working in my pajamas, which really annoys my coworkers: me, myself, and I.

Victoria 

So what would you recommend for people who are, especially people who are working remotely, they may not be having a lot of interaction through throughout the day? What are some styles, some outfits that people like me can put together and and feel like, like right now I'm wearing like a white t-shirt and jeans and a sweater so that I'm not cold, but it's not particularly expressive. So what would you add to that in order to make it more expression based?

Daron:

Well your clothing has to work for you as far as what your lifestyle requires. And so if the lifestyle is, you know, working from home, working remotely, it's important to pay attention to that because you don't want to have clothes in your closet that you're not gonna wear because you feel like you don't have the occasion.

So color I think is the first thing to talk about. Even if it's just a simple pullover sweater that is ultra cozy and keeps you warm. If it's a color that you put it on and it feels joyful for you and you're on zoom, and you see yourself, and you're like, wow, my skin tone looks great and my eyes are so bright and you look vibrant and healthy, you're going to like how it feels so much more. Color plays such a big role in the visual communication.

So there's certain styles that don't make sense for, you know, casual work from home as far as like really structured blazers or silk blouses which feel more like clothes for outside of the home.

That's why I recommend starting with color. It can be as comfortable as can be, but you're focusing on color as being a calling card. The other thing is, especially since 2020 and beyond, there are so many options in the marketplace that are soft structure. So as a result of a lot of people transitioning to working from home over the last number of years, many designers picked up on that. And at every price point you can find really stylish pieces that are so comfortable. You could go on a hike or you could also go to dinner...you can go on zoom. There really are those transitional styles. So that comes back to when you're making selections and you're being intentional, you're asking yourself, you know, how does this make me feel and does this work for my lifestyle? So instead of buying a super structured wool blazer that when you sit all day feels too much you could transition that into, you know, a wool sweater or a soft structure that would accomplish that same feeling for you. So reinventing how you look at clothing as an expression piece in general, instead of just buying things for strictly the comfort, trying to kind of play that game of, ooh, but I'm looking for more color or I'm looking for pattern or something that is gonna have more of a conversation piece for you.

Victoria:

Yeah I think so many things come back to mindset and intention, but I do think what you're sharing about color and feel is one of the ways that I could totally see that working.

Daron:

Right because you could take the same sweater that you might wear with say a pair of like comfortable joggers to just be at home for the day and then that you could transition that into a pair of jeans with heels for an evening. It's the same sweater—you're just utilizing it in different ways within your wardrobe.

Accessories also play a big role. I noticed you have some beautiful orange hoops on today. Accessories are a really big part of our expression. Our jewelry often means something to us beyond just that it's pretty— it's an adornment perhaps as a story. Perhaps it's from your grandmother, perhaps it's from, you know, a good friend or it's just something you go, Ooh, that's so fun. So accessories can really play in as well to feeling like it's not just Groundhog Day. I'm doing something that feels intentional for myself today.

Victoria 

"I'm doing something intentional for myself today." I'm going to be using that affirmation on more than just fashion. So the last style tip I asked Daron to share has to do with something I learned that kind of blew my mind when we talked about colors. Daron shared how to get more versatility out of certain colors, even ones we associate as being seasonal.

Victoria:

When I was working with you, you shared some really great insight around how certain colors can be year round and I was surprised by some of them that I would  maybe associate as more of a winter color. And the same thing goes for what I learned about the weight of certain clothes. So for example, I bought some, you probably remember, some lighter weight cognac corduroy pants recently that you said can be worn in spring. So I feel like you might be able to blow people's mind's in this regard in terms of color and certain weights of clothing that can be worn. Maybe not at every day of the year, but more than maybe we think. Because I think we have a tendency to kind of categorize clothes and separate them. And maybe part of the frustration of getting dressed is some of the things that could be incorporated are now put away with our other seasonal clothes.

Daron:

There's really only two categories in your closet that should be specifically seasonal. And that is your actual winter coats that six weeks out of the year or maybe like this year, maybe it's three months out of the year <laugh>. So think about that short period of time in the Northwest when it's cold. You need the wool sweaters. You need the really heavy, thick, winter coats. And the opposite end of the spectrum would be sort of the vacation only, you know, like the maxi dress. Something that really does need the heat of summer or is travel specific. That should be a very small percentage of your closet. Everything else should be able to be worn essentially with a few caveats all year long.

So let's take a color that people really think about as being a fall color and that would be, like purple or aubergine, right? We see that color really take stage in the fall and fashion likes to sort of choose, fall colors and spring colors because that's how we keep the wheels turning of something new, something different. But it doesn't mean you can't wear colors all year long. So back to aubergine. Think burgundy, purple, they're kind of all in that same vein. So it's the deep saturated dark colors that we associate as fall as soon as you put them on. Let's say you have an aubergine pair of pants that you wear all fall with say a dark boot, and you think I need to put that away until next fall. Absolutely not. Instead, the first thing you do is you change your footwear.

Your footwear tells the story of the season. So you take the same dark purple or burgundy pant and instead of wearing it with a closed toed booty, wear it with an open toe cognac colored sandal. Cognac is a super universal transitional color. It just kind of works with literally everything. Mustard is like that too. I could be here all day with color combos, but I'll just stick with those two.

So first thing you do is change the shoe and then you lighten up the top colors too. So you're going for contrast. So in the fall maybe you would've worn that aubergine pant with a brown or dark brown boot and maybe a black sweater. So now we're going to put on a denim jacket and a printed tank, and an open-toed shoe. And it looks completely wonderful for a spring season. It's the same pant you wore four months ago, but you are totally reinvented how you're wearing it.

Now, on the reverse side of that, you have your lightweight color denim jacket that maybe you've only been wearing in the spring summer because it's a light colored denim.  So you take that light colored denim into your fall and winter seasons by layering a sweater underneath it or a sweater tank, then pair that back to a really dark colored bottom and a pair of booties and it's gonna look great because you're bringing in contrast. So it's really, it can sound kind of complex of like, oh my gosh, that's a lot of options. But when you're choosing, I think that's one of the joys of working with a stylist is you kind of clear out all of the mental clutter about how you're getting dressed.

And you just learn how effortless these combinations can be when you have the right tools in your closet. And what I mean by the right tools is you have clothing that fits you well and you have a color story that can be as broad as you want it to be, but it's a color story that's not limiting you, where you can only wear something in one outfit because it translates to all these other pieces. And many of us are, I think, more focused about piece-buying and what that means is you want something new. And you go out and you get that one piece, but it doesn't perhaps resonate with what's in your closet. And so then you wear it that one way and then you feel like just you can't wear it that often. 

A couple other colors that I think are pretty season specific would be, for example, a color that is most often worn in the spring and summertime would be like a soft kind of petal pink, like a blush color. So of course that looks great with your navy and your white and your khaki. It also looks fantastic with the deep browns and the deep purples, but we could just keep interchanging that and we change the footwear, we change that third-piece layering, and you could be in whatever season you wanna be. So for me it's, it's second nature and really fun. And I love helping people and watching their eyes bug out and go, what? I can wear those.

Victoria:

So what do you think about that? What do you think about Daron's advice around what gets put away versus what stays? I'm so curious how many of you are already doing this. You'll have to write me and let me know.

I also really appreciate how Daron breaks things down into real action steps. Maybe it's not about going shopping and buying new things entirely, but reimagining how to put things together that we already own, especially color stories. See what I did there? I'm smarter already for my research.

I wonder what Daron would say about burnt orange, which I think of as mostly fall.

So as I wrapped up my conversation with Daron, I asked her what'd she'd do if she had a magic wand that could help all of us understand personal style the way she sees it.

Victoria:

What do you wish more women understood about style?

Daron:

That it's for everyone. You don't have to be going anywhere. You don't have to have a high visibility workspace. You don't need to be a jet setter. You don't need to be going to happy hour all the time. Style is something that we each have an opportunity every single day to gift ourselves that expression and honors who we really are. There's a lot of things throughout the day we have no control over and we just need to kind of ride the waves, but we get the chance each day to choose how we want to feel in our style and in our clothing. And it's a really powerful expression and I wish that more women and men and folks across the world would really embrace that side of themselves because I think it brings an immense amount of confidence and authenticity and joy when it's used as a personal expression and not just covering your body. It's a very different interaction that you can have with yourself.

Victoria:

This last part felt like a message in the bottle just for me. I get so excited about the idea of having better interactions with myself because in the end, I am either the best or worst friend I will ever have.

I know little Victoria and her evil genius are thrilled with her grownup self's fashion revival adventures, knowing she's searched and rediscovered the wisdom and freedom that once felt second nature. Don't you just love life's good old round trip lessons?

Speaking of love, I'd love to hear your takeaways. Drop me a line at [email protected] and let me know if you end up using any of these fashion tips that you heard about today. Send pictures for an added bonus. 

To learn more about the personal styling program that Daron runs at The Difference, you can reach her at [email protected].